[ hAtEfUl-lUrVe ]

dying freak

2005-06-16T20:14:00.000-07:00

hmmm. went to navigate around this morning. saw a few death skins and thought if death was best for me. there was nothing left in this world for me. she dun even give a damn. when someone told me she was sick i wondered if she was okay. but all the treatment i get back was all pathetic. i admit i like her alot but she knows right. she weeps and my heart hurts. she wanted me to scold her some pathetic words but i can't just bring myself to it. its my fault, all along i know it is all my fault. i am just a pathetic fool right. sorry lar. i just wanna know whats she thinking. now even king of hades want me down. i might as well succumb to him. i am sorry. i didn't know how in the fucking hell did i make u angry. would you be willing to gimme a chance. i protected ur name with my life. i can get into fights just like that. i just wanted u to know. u weighs a lot in my heart. u played a role that no one else can. if u wanna stop just like that i would wanna know why. i know u are intelligent, as in studies and also life. but are u giving me the cold shoulder? i just wanted to know. from now onwards i promised my mum that the next half year i will study and get better results also to think of u all along. recently, i thought about my dad. i knew the time he went i will regret but seeing him clinging onto life. i pledged upon myself i would get into biology and try to find a cure for cancer so i can save people. this might look like a dream but upon seeing the happy faces on all people. i myself will be extremely glad. may god bless you! my loved!

XiNlUrVe (=

recent events...

2005-06-09T17:46:00.000-07:00

on 6th june.. it was NYAA.. after that i got cca and also need to go to computer lab to do IPW. fundamentally, it wasn't me in charge of the webpage but the report. but as the leader i had to go. when reached, saw my team members playing games instead of doing the webpage.. i felt devastated and wanted to scold them. however i just kept my mouth shut. den arthas come kao bei me for no reason.. i really want to fight me on the spot but i just can't cause he is also one of my team members. before my cca, i was with the gang as in kah yong they all la. we went to buy drinks from the vending machines, as usual, zheng chao and malcolm copied every word i said and spoke it in another tone. i knew that they wanted to make me du lan so i chased after them... i chased after zhengchao and he went to the netball court. coming down, i dun give a damn. den roger dunno why came to block my way. den he punched me on my shoulder and i give him another punch into his ribcage. he didn't dare to punch me back and perhaps he is scared. lol. didn't know much about him and think he is just a HUM JI. ( sorry. amanda. those are words from my heart ). after everything we went to eat lunch. along with jolyn, jamie and adina... never always hanged oout with them. we went to eat den went playground and talk about this and that... saw the other side of jolyn.. didn't know that she will be stressed too.. she always seemed happy.. and then adina too.. as in not stressed la but can she that she is always happy.. suppose i just made a new enemy by giving my own opinions... hai.. only pathetic fools "ji" chou!

XiNlUrVe =)

7th june..
it was a fine day when my friends called me to go sim lim square with him to upgrade his computer from 300++ ram to 760++ ram.. haha... we went and shopped for rams.. also asking about this and that.. den we went back.. on the way, we heard lots of lao shu ai da mi and then when my friend said that last week were all tong hua and we heard a shop playing it... isn't it so eerie.. haha... den we went back jurong point and my friend purchased a gunbound prepaid card.. den we went play basketball with his brother who was the strongest in boonlay cc... didn't expect him to be so fun and open.. thought he was always serious... however he kana trashed but a pathetic fool 3-0. that pathetic fool was a fucker... he took the ball and charged it and i fended myself using my hands and he said that i fouled him.. seeing that he is so pathetic and i give in to the foul.. letting him too much fouls and i lost 7-6... what the fuck right... haha.. sian la... den went back home lor and do things...

XiNlUrVe =]

hai...

2005-05-16T18:57:00.000-07:00

still as sad u all might think.. so many things happened in a flash.. so fast... faster den lightning strikes.. hai.. maybe depressed u all might think.. also dunoe why all this will happen... hai... at least she cares... she cares.. but why?

maybe if all this haven't happened... we all still might be okay... always after a storm, comes a calm.. the calm comes slowly.. sometimes it wouldn't come and the disaster keeps going and going..

when the calm comes, it is just like spring after winter.. the feeling so nice but the pain still there.. time could heal all wounds but not all.. mine might be a serious case... huh..

time time time, it is all about time.. sian.. never mind... got to go le.. hehe..

XiNlUrVe :/

Long Basketball Match

2005-04-09T08:04:00.000-07:00

Haiz.. today was so fun... went to jie wei's house to see how he sprained his leg yesterday... attempting a jump shot he came down landing his foot on eddie's... pathetic right.. back to the match... we were playing match when the rc gals came asking ask about playing a full court match... we agreed on the spot.. the first quarter i played the reserve. everything was going well when star player of our team had to returned home and i was substituted into the match. our team kept changing positions.. i scored a feel goals when it was their attack. they attack and i was marking one of the gals.. she got the ball but i raised my hand over her. she attempted a shot but works and her head hit my hand and she was onto the ground. i was feeling guilty. however i was substituted out and i can't even say sorry..

If she ever came to this blog, i will gladly say sorry!!

XiNlUrVe =(

IPW fucking survey!!

2005-04-04T01:58:00.000-07:00

i tried all means to set permission for my ipw survey to work le. but what the fuck... cant simply just do it.. haiz.. today was such a boring day. during afternoon, saw weiyu and cindy 2gether. wanna say hi also cannot. so ill-fated am i. haiz... i think she is avoiding me or something like that! who can help me ne?

XiNlUrVe =(

Holidays Are So Sian!!

2005-03-16T21:14:00.000-08:00

Why are all holidays so sian leh? Having the same routine everyday is also very sian. Dunno what to do leh.. Perhaps later going to Creative Warehouse Sale to purchase a mp3 player. Haha. With friends q'ing overnight bah, why is everyday so sian. When the sun goes down and everything like that. Haha. What shall i do ne? Gimme some comments man. Thank You!!

XiNlUrVe =)

A Simple Dream

2005-03-04T20:45:00.000-08:00

i know what i need when i grow up... perhaps a good wife.. if only it comes true la...
Ambition: Marine Biologist (but my science v lan)
Dream: a lovely house and a wife.. with children and everyday with happiness.. no neeed that much money.. a little can le.. every month can save around 2-3k very happy le... who might knows? perhaps ne? with children siao shun wo, i happy until siao liao.. haha.. today, so sian.. computer spoilt... haha... dunoe leh... joined the FUGLYS and is a Double Agent... perhaps going to be promoted to Triple Agent.. haha... write until here le...

**************
Maplestory: XiNlUrVe

XiNlUrVe =)

To WanQi's House

2005-01-10T03:00:00.000-08:00

Today was a good day, i was heading home for some work when i saw WanQi and Patrick! Patrick called me to go along to WanQi's house to fix her computer. Her computer was having the last stage of blasterworm which makes me laugh like a hyena. Haha, we persuaded her to reformat the computer but she doesn;t want cause she says that there are lotsa things in her com. Bet it was some sort of yellowish stuff but suppose it wasn't after all. Then we started chatting and chatting. After a long and hard time, we went home and i saw Jordan and AKM on the bus. We went chatting too and i reached home fast. Watching tv, somebody called me and we chatted. And another day slowly passed on! Haha!!

XiNlUrVe =)

Christmas!

2004-12-25T10:00:00.000-08:00

Oh yea! Christmas has arrived and its got be a new year soon!! Hahaz, so happy that i won a teddy and a clown in a draw man!! So lucky, it was morning and i kept playing gunbound and had some secrets with another friend and didn't decide to tell it away. Christmas, i wondered, what would i get. As i reach for my pockets and pulled out the key which the key chain was there. Looking at this key chain! I wondered would i be as happy in the next year! Christmas gonna be busy so bye and take care everybody!!

XiNlUrVe =)

Arriving Christmas!

2004-12-20T04:37:00.000-08:00

The smiles on her face made me glow radiantly. The coldness of the winter wind pierced my bones and sent chills down my spine. I wished Christmas arrive earlier and New Year too. I know some of you are having problems listening to the music i put on my blog. I will try to rectify the problem as soon as possible, but guys hanging out there, dun stop tagging, lol. Nexy year's gonna be tough, everybody was telling me that, but i dunoe if i will pass the mark. IPW and streaming, oh my god!! Went lan-gaming with Malcolm and his friends. Hahaz, professionals, ain't them. Christmas is gonna arrive!!

XiNlUrVe =)

Changed Blogskin

2004-12-15T11:00:00.000-08:00

Finally changed my blogskin and added a suitable tag board. Quite hard work but effort is paid off. Wonder what will i get for my christmas present. A broom? Nah. Maybe a peek at next year, that is much more better. The days are fluttering by and soon our holidays will be gone. As Sec 2, there is gonna be streaming and lots of other things. IPW and everything will sure tie me down for the time being. Looking back into the years, the happy memories and everything that once made me happy stands in my mind but for those whu bring misery and sadness. Only those from a particular person stands. I was happy with her and maybe sad. Christmas, arrive faster!!

XiNlUrVe =)

Whole New Year Gonna Start

2004-12-13T10:00:00.000-08:00

Christmas is around the corner and everybody is busy whipping up their own cakes and dishes. With mistletoe all around and I suppose this will might be the best Christmas I have. Turning back and looking into the years, i feel miserable. So many things given up, from that to this. When her smiles lighten my day and weeps shatters my heart, I was just pathetically sick in the holidays. Sore throat, fever and influenza. However, there were a few friends to stand by me. They were good friends and care more them they could. From higher chinese to express chinese, I think it is good for me cause a drop is always better then nothing. Lol, you might think and this coming year, I am gonna break every obstacle and make them suffer cause I am turning evil!!

XiNlUrVe =)